Youth battle homosexuality
FEATURE - Muslim youth in Cape Town are finding themselves facing an internal battle of homosexuality, as a direct conflict with their core Islamic beliefs and their family ideals. Many youngsters are dealing with their issues privately, and fear they will be ostracised by their family and friends, should they speak out. A VOC survey amongst a group of Muslim youth on the Cape Flats found that many young people were helpless and had no one to turn to. Youth from various areas spoke about the challenge in breaking the silence and fulfilling their moral responsibilities as Muslims to stand up and speak out against what is deemed to be an unnatural practice.
Fadwah Regal (all names have been changed), a 20 year old student, said that as a young Muslim woman, being a lesbian is one of the hardest challenges in her life. She is seeking the necessary help to confront her situation. “When I was in grade eight I started moving away from guys as I was more comfortable with girls. When I got older I only started dating as I started meeting people in the same group as myself. It has gotten to that point where I can’t get out of it… I’m already deep in it. But I want to move away from my lifestyle and start living a positive and righteous life,” she revealed.
For Raafiq Adams, a 22 year old journalism student living in the Salt River area, life has been different since breaking out about his homosexual issues with his family. “My news came as a shock to my family especially my dad. I know that somehow I have hurt them a lot and ask Allah (swt) to guide me on the rightous path and steer me away from who I am before the day I die. I want to start living an Islamic lifestyle away from all of this and with friends and society having lots of bad influences, I am struggling to reach that point,” he said.
Imraan Stevens, a 21 year old second year business student, said that one of the hardest issues that he has to deal with is the fact that because he has been homosexual since grade 11, it is the only life he knows. “I’ve been like this for quite some time and it came as a huge shock to my family when they found out.
"At the time when I first started exploring it with my friends, I wasn’t quite sure if this was the right thing to do and I was a bit sceptical, although I strongly felt part of me is heading that way. Coming from a strict religious background, reading Quran and making salah, I knew that what I was doing was wrong but I still went ahead and continued it, until I was introduced to The Inner Circle (TIC) organization in Wynberg, ” he recalled.
TIC has been criticised by various Muslim scholars in Cape Town after their establishment in 1996. Founder of TIC, Moegsien Hendricks registered the organization in 2004 as a NPO and human rights organization to assist queer Muslims to reconcile Islam with their sexuality. Stevens said that some of his friends parents who were involved at the organization would invite them every week to come and sit in at the workshops and this drew him deeper into homosexuality.
“They were basically looking for more people to join their organization and the mass boeka’s and workshop was an opportunity for them to build their place up. They would host workshops to get us to accept who we are and how to come out with the truth to our relatives and accept who we are.” He added that if his iman was strong enough to be able to know that what the organization was practicing, he would never have continued sitting in on the workshops.
Most youth struggled with the notion of ‘being homosexual and Muslim at the same time. Adams was of the opinion that one could not engage in a homosexual lifestyle and still be a practising Muslim. “I don’t believe that it is even a question for it is considered as inappropriate for anyone. I know that I am Muslim and what I’m involved in is wrong, but I have realized the disgrace and this I do not agree with.”
“To be honest, it’s a really hard question to answer as I know according to Islam it’s regarded as a huge sin. But on the other hand, I use to think that I can be Muslim and homosexual at the same time. It’s a hard situation to be in and once you in it, it is surely hard to get out,” said Stevens, adding that he sometimes feels a huge guilt, but remains in his situation due to his friends.
Regal said that she feels ashamed of herself at many times and sits on her salah mat crying asking Allah to guide her. “I know that it is wrong and that I should not be doing this. Sometimes I think to myself ‘I am a Muslim and see what I am putting myself in’.” Asked whether they would take the first few steps to changing and walking away from homosexuality, the majority of youth said they struggled to get to that point due to the fact that they socialised in the same circle.
Regal said she wants to reject homosexuality and start living a clean, chaste life. “I would sit and cry every day and ask Allah to forgive me and make me a better person. It is so hard to deal with this. I want to change and it’s not something that will happen overnight. It will take place soon Insha Allah and I believe that it is possible, for there’s always space for change and I believe that in my life, I will too,” she lamented.
Stevens was just as hopeful, but admitted that breaking away from his friends, knowing that they are in the same environment every day would be tough. “I believe that there is a possibility for me to change and I am hoping to get there Insha Allah. I need the utmost support from family to make my first few steps to the righteous path and not by being mocked by society,” he said.
With the realization that more and more countries around the world are beginning to show tolerance towards the lifestyle of the gay community, statistics show that most of the Western and European countries already allow homosexuals to enter into marriage or some relationship comparable to it. Some states even repealed laws discriminating against homosexuals and others have already given legal recognition to homosexual relations. The question remains with the pink lobby so strong in cities like Cape Town, how to prevent Muslim youth from falling into its trap, without ignoring the dilemma these youth face.
Fadwah Regal (all names have been changed), a 20 year old student, said that as a young Muslim woman, being a lesbian is one of the hardest challenges in her life. She is seeking the necessary help to confront her situation. “When I was in grade eight I started moving away from guys as I was more comfortable with girls. When I got older I only started dating as I started meeting people in the same group as myself. It has gotten to that point where I can’t get out of it… I’m already deep in it. But I want to move away from my lifestyle and start living a positive and righteous life,” she revealed.
For Raafiq Adams, a 22 year old journalism student living in the Salt River area, life has been different since breaking out about his homosexual issues with his family. “My news came as a shock to my family especially my dad. I know that somehow I have hurt them a lot and ask Allah (swt) to guide me on the rightous path and steer me away from who I am before the day I die. I want to start living an Islamic lifestyle away from all of this and with friends and society having lots of bad influences, I am struggling to reach that point,” he said.
Imraan Stevens, a 21 year old second year business student, said that one of the hardest issues that he has to deal with is the fact that because he has been homosexual since grade 11, it is the only life he knows. “I’ve been like this for quite some time and it came as a huge shock to my family when they found out.
"At the time when I first started exploring it with my friends, I wasn’t quite sure if this was the right thing to do and I was a bit sceptical, although I strongly felt part of me is heading that way. Coming from a strict religious background, reading Quran and making salah, I knew that what I was doing was wrong but I still went ahead and continued it, until I was introduced to The Inner Circle (TIC) organization in Wynberg, ” he recalled.
Finding solace
Stevens said that he went with friends out of interest and was surprised to see the environment at the organization. “The first time I went was in 2010 when they had a mass boeka in Ramadan at TIC and like any other Muslim environment, they had their Arabic scripts on the walls, salah room, women wore hijab and men wore their fezzes,” he described. “Everything looked normal. It made you believe and understand who you basically are as a Muslim, that it was okay to be homosexual and that there’s a chance for you.”TIC has been criticised by various Muslim scholars in Cape Town after their establishment in 1996. Founder of TIC, Moegsien Hendricks registered the organization in 2004 as a NPO and human rights organization to assist queer Muslims to reconcile Islam with their sexuality. Stevens said that some of his friends parents who were involved at the organization would invite them every week to come and sit in at the workshops and this drew him deeper into homosexuality.
“They were basically looking for more people to join their organization and the mass boeka’s and workshop was an opportunity for them to build their place up. They would host workshops to get us to accept who we are and how to come out with the truth to our relatives and accept who we are.” He added that if his iman was strong enough to be able to know that what the organization was practicing, he would never have continued sitting in on the workshops.
Shame
He said that most of his relatives have distanced themselves from him and that his situation has brought a huge veil of scandal within the family. “Since they have discovered that I’m homosexual, they’ve been acting like I’m some kind of disease. I want to change and believe that there are possibilities for me to change but with all the challenges and confusion, I am struggling to reach that point.”Most youth struggled with the notion of ‘being homosexual and Muslim at the same time. Adams was of the opinion that one could not engage in a homosexual lifestyle and still be a practising Muslim. “I don’t believe that it is even a question for it is considered as inappropriate for anyone. I know that I am Muslim and what I’m involved in is wrong, but I have realized the disgrace and this I do not agree with.”
“To be honest, it’s a really hard question to answer as I know according to Islam it’s regarded as a huge sin. But on the other hand, I use to think that I can be Muslim and homosexual at the same time. It’s a hard situation to be in and once you in it, it is surely hard to get out,” said Stevens, adding that he sometimes feels a huge guilt, but remains in his situation due to his friends.
Regal said that she feels ashamed of herself at many times and sits on her salah mat crying asking Allah to guide her. “I know that it is wrong and that I should not be doing this. Sometimes I think to myself ‘I am a Muslim and see what I am putting myself in’.” Asked whether they would take the first few steps to changing and walking away from homosexuality, the majority of youth said they struggled to get to that point due to the fact that they socialised in the same circle.
Regal said she wants to reject homosexuality and start living a clean, chaste life. “I would sit and cry every day and ask Allah to forgive me and make me a better person. It is so hard to deal with this. I want to change and it’s not something that will happen overnight. It will take place soon Insha Allah and I believe that it is possible, for there’s always space for change and I believe that in my life, I will too,” she lamented.
Stevens was just as hopeful, but admitted that breaking away from his friends, knowing that they are in the same environment every day would be tough. “I believe that there is a possibility for me to change and I am hoping to get there Insha Allah. I need the utmost support from family to make my first few steps to the righteous path and not by being mocked by society,” he said.
With the realization that more and more countries around the world are beginning to show tolerance towards the lifestyle of the gay community, statistics show that most of the Western and European countries already allow homosexuals to enter into marriage or some relationship comparable to it. Some states even repealed laws discriminating against homosexuals and others have already given legal recognition to homosexual relations. The question remains with the pink lobby so strong in cities like Cape Town, how to prevent Muslim youth from falling into its trap, without ignoring the dilemma these youth face.
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